Three strategies will help you gather facts and use targeted strategies to deal with the person or the situation.
Active Listening
The first tactic, and possibly the most important, is to listen empathetically, which is listening while trying to be sensitive to the various components and levels of the message. We’ve already learned some strategies in module four for active listening. In addition, try to listen for the following information:
- The Why: Why is the person communicating with me?
- The Length: What can the size of the message tell me about the importance of the message to the person?
- The Words: Does the person use formal, aloof language? Impatience?
- The Volume and Pace: What emotional pressures can be sensed?
Note taking after a Discussion
A second tactic is to write down your recollection of the discussion that just took place. The notes can be used to support your next communication with the difficult person. Note taking also gives you the opportunity to plan and organize before the next communication takes place.
Writing Your Communication
Putting your thoughts into writing has three important benefits:
- The difficult person cannot interrupt with an objection
- It’s easier to provide orderly communication in writing than in a discussion
- Written communication is pure; there is no body language to shape the outcome, reducing the possibility of mixed messages.